Writing Cleanly: Into battle

Hi everyone, and welcome back to Too Many Books to Count! I’m so glad you stopped by, and I hope that you enjoyed last month’s series—it was a lot of fun for me to work on.

This month, because I wanted to be a little different, we’re not going to be talking about anything to do with Valentine’s day. I know, I know, I usually do a series on love in writing, or some such thing, but honestly… I’m doing that in the RADblog this month, and I didn’t want to do it here, too ;-)

So instead, let’s talk about clean writing. And by clean writing, I don’t mean writing without any errors. I mean, writing that adheres to the “clean” mantra/genre/category. Clean writing, as in, writing that’s suitable for submission to RAD Writing, you might say. ;-) (am I winking too much?)

It can be a great struggle, for a lot of writers, to write something amazing, something that’s still hard hitting and doesn’t compromise on story, all because we want to write clean fiction. I’ll be really honest with you guys. A lot of indie authors who write clean fiction, do so very poorly. I’m saying that because I’ve read a lot of indie authors who write clean fiction, and because I’m an editor, so I know good writing when I see it—and a lot of those books… they aren’t. I’m sorry for saying it, but they’re just not great.

I want to help, in that regard.

So I’ve designed this month’s series around four topics that I know many clean writers struggle with, and I hope to help you tackle writing these subjects, without compromise.

Writing Cleanly: Into Battle

Let’s get one thing perfectly straight, before we go any further: some readers won’t like your battle scenes, no matter how you write them. If you go too gory, some readers won’t like it. If you don’t go gory enough, other readers won’t like it. So I’m going to try to explain this, to the best of my ability, to aim you straight down the middle—where you’re more likely to please the greatest number of readers. That’s what we’re all after, really.

Now I’m going to put on my editor hat, and I’ll be telling it to you straight.

When you’re writing battle scenes in general, you want to give as much detail as possible, without going too overboard on where people/battalions/troupes are physically standing. It can get muddled and confused for readers, when you give too much information as far as standing locations. Make those locations briefly stated, very to-the-point, and move on.

When you’re writing battle scenes, make sure you have a clear image in your head, of what’s going down. If you’re a seat-of-your-pants writer, like me, try writing an abridged version of your scene, just so you know who’s where and what’s happening, and then go back in and fill out some detail. If it helps, get out a piece of paper and draw a diagram. Arrows are your friend! It doesn’t have to look good, and no one ever has to see it but you. Seriously. I won’t even ask to see it.

Once you have that in your head, and once you know what’s happening, go in and put some details. Tell me things like what you’re POV character is seeing, whether or not time is slowing (or speeding) for them. Tell me about the weather, and whether it’s affecting the way anyone fights. Tell me if someone close to your POV character looks tired, and what the POV character thinks of that.

Show me someone getting injured. Whether that’s a stab through the stomach (survivable, in many cases) or a bullet through the head (obviously not survivable), is up to you. I want to see your POV character react to that instant. I want them to see it, too feel it, and to have some sort of reaction. Why? Because that’s more moving for a reader than if the injury occurs to your POV character straight out of the gate.

Take your time here. Be thoughtful with the things you choose to describe, and make sure each description has a actual, required reason why it's there. More often than not, this will depend on your POV character and their state of mind before the battle began, or the place you need them to be when the battle is over.

Now that you’ve done all that, let’s really look into what it means to be clean.

Above, you’ll notice that I didn’t tell you not to be gory. I wanted detail. I wanted to see people injured. I wanted to see some carnage.

It’s in the edits that you’ll cut it down and decide whether things are clean or not. And if you’re not sure, then leave it for your editor! You can always discuss it with them, if you want a second opinion.

The thing to keep in mind is that in battle, there should be gore—but that most readers of clean fiction don’t actually want to see it. Some will, sure, but most want the allusion to pain and suffering in battle, rather than the blood and guts details. So in your editing, go through and cut anything visceral. If someone’s entrails are on the ground, maybe go zip them back inside.

Because you wrote the gruesome first, because you, the author, know what everything should look like, you’re the perfect person to cut it down to size. You know what details are important to your POV character, and therefore need to be left in. You know which injuries will be mentioned later on in the story, and therefore need to be left in. You know what’s going to be important later, and so you need to be the one to decide most of this.

My general rule of thumb, when it comes to writing battle scenes? If I wouldn’t want my thirteen-year-old cousin to read it because I think it’s too gruesome, I need to dial it back.

That right there is the best advice I can possibly give you.

[love]

{Rani Divine}